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Brief Retrospective: 2017 A.D.

2017 was my year of ownership: of joy, pain, and learning to learn all over again. It was a great year for personal growth. I dislike the idea that people must struggle in order to rise to a higher plane, because most suffering is unnecessary. But in a world were we like abbreviations and shortcuts; …

Meditation

“Rosa de frente con la vista hacia abajo” feat. Rosa Covarrubias Rolanda, by Carl van Vetchen. I feel: – gratitude – softness – deep care – deep love. I am working on my focus. See also: – Femme Too Deep by Baby Ange: “Focus as Resistance.” – Woodland Secrets by merritt k: “Gita Jackson.” – “Well, I guess …

History is not prescriptive.

Sailor Saturn & Sailor Moon in “The Shining Shooting Star: Saturn and the Messiah,” Sailor Moon S (February 11, 1995) “Indeed, some of us did not die. And what shall we do, we who did not die?” ____________ “The past is never dead. It is not even past.” _______________ What do you got to offer? …

Selfishness in Compassion

I read through a New Yorker article, by Joshua Rotham, on a movement that pushes for people to stop having kids. Referred to as the anti-natalist movement, adherents argue that because human suffering is immense and reaches all forms of life beyond the human race, humans should stop procreating. Essentially, as the article title suggests, …

Self-Contempt and Its Inverses

Denying oneself confidence and compassion is cruel. What is that for? Do you deserve to suffer? If you are worried about ruining an event or a not measuring up to a responsibility, is it okay to deny yourself some compassion because you think others wont give it to you? Does the other have to matter …

Cocooning femme.

Being sick adds a different dimension to refusal. My body refuses to cooperate to the demands of the outside world, like productivity. My body is healing me, and I have to listen and be still with that. The ability to heal is an indicator that I’m overall in good health. It is okay. November puts …

To Refuse

I am embodying a practice of refusal. Studying histories of race, racism, race relations, and systems of harm gave me a language to process and discuss my past and ongoing experiences with psychological violence and interpersonal neglect within white suburbia + its institutions. From my late teenage years on, I slowly adopted a built a …

Crabs in the Swamp // 11.02.17

D.Va Room by artist/cosplayer Jenni (Pixelninja) Why are women still sexualized in cyber-punk fantasies? Why do scifi artists still imagine worlds on the ground as we approach our over-heated climate reality? Why do our imagined fantasies still revolve around colonized/privatized spaces? What about the outback, the badlands, or decolonized/uncolonizable spaces? Exclusion causes misery, but the …

mine&mine // 9. 01. 17

I had a really relaxing break? With minimal stress, excluding select instances that turned out to be minor? Usually I don’t do valley-girl inflected statements, but this is unironic because THIS ALMOST NEVER HAPPENS TO ME ;____________; Truly! During undergrad, I worked or had to focus on some kind of research project year after year, …

Internet Roundup // 4.12.16

Poster for Satoshi Kon’s Perfect Blue (1997) You think I’ll be the dark sky so you can be the star? I’ll swallow you whole. – Warsan Shire “Why do we have to live in an anime?” I’ve asked my friends this in frustration, cynicism, and humor the past month. Later, I switched it from “anime” to “Final …