Being sick adds a different dimension to refusal. My body refuses to cooperate to the demands of the outside world, like productivity. My body is healing me, and I have to listen and be still with that. The ability to heal is an indicator that I’m overall in good health. It is okay.
November puts an accelerator on time: demands, responsibilities, and Daylight’s Savings Time. And now, exams. I need to adjust my schedule so I can sleep more and work more diligently during the day. My body does better that way; otherwise, depression becomes my long-time companion. I think my own company, as cheerleader and higher self, is a better friend.
There’s something fantastic and exhilarating about being on the tip of something wonderful. Even if it doesn’t happen tomorrow or soon, knowing that it will happen at some point is a nice feeling. I’m blessed.
Women of Color in america have grown up within a symphony of anger at being silenced at being unchosen, at knowing that when we survive, it is in spite of a world that takes for granted our lack of humanness, and which hates our very existence outside of its service. And I say symphony rather than cacophony because we have had to learn to orchestrate those furies so that they do not tear us apart. We have had to learn to move through them and use them for strength and force and insight within our daily lives. Those of us who did not learn this difficult lesson did not survive. And part of my anger is always libation for my fallen sisters. – Audre Lorde, “The Uses of Anger: Women Responding to Racism,” Sister Outsider: Essays & Speeches by Audre Lorde
The Funambulist is quite good. I also recommend their podcast. Highlights:
– Mehammed Mack: Virilism, Clandestiny and Alternative Modes of Being Queer & Arab in France
– Mabel O. Wilson: Can the Master’s Tools Dismantle the Master’s House?
– Nacira Guénif-Souilamas: Design of French Structural Racism
– Alexander Weheliye: A Black Critique of the Concept of Bare Life
Complement to the Funamblist: Here There Be Dragons podcast.
I really enjoy Soma’s music.